Taking stock...

So, its been a while since I've last posted, slightly over 4 months to be exact (are you noticing a theme yet??). Can you say busy??? ;-) OK, so get ready for the book that is coming, figured I better make up for the lack in posting ;-)

Its been over a year since our lives forever changed, since our third precious daughter came home, and I thought it would be good to look back, and take stock. Adoption is an incredible journey but it is not for the faint of heart. We are doing well, I think, but we have our good days and our bad days, our challenges and frustrations, and our joys and triumphs. I never thought it would be as tough as it has been, and I thought I was realistically prepared for what to expect :-) So, part of this is a selfish post, to encourage myself with how far we have come instead of thinking only of how far we have to go.

-July 30th, 2009: we got word that our HCO had been granted and we could go (finally!!!!) to HK to get our daughter. Thus began the mad rush of preparation for my (Mommas) departure to HK on Ag 7th.

- Fri Aug 7th, 2009: I (momma) flew to HK, arriving on the evening of the 8th.

- Sun Aug 9th, 2009: Had the day to rest/try to get over jetlag before meting EB in the morning.

-Mon Aug 10th, 2009: Met my daughter for the first time (I am not gifted enough with words to express all the thoughts and emotions I went through on this incredible day, suffice to say it ran the whole gamut)!!! We all (2 social workers, foster mother, foster brother, me & EB) went out for lunch and then returned to her foster home. In an attempt to make this life changing situation a little easier on EB, she stayed at her foster home and we had a 'gradual transition'/visits... not sure that it IS possible to make this easier, but we tried...

Tues Aug 11th, 2009: Went back to EB's foster home and spent more time with her. Then took her with me to the apartment that I was staying in. Let her nap there to get 'used to' the surroundings and me :-) Then took her back to her foster home for dinner and sleep.

Weds Aug 12th, 2009: Went to EB's foster home to pick her up. She had her final goodbye with her foster family and they with her. She seemed fine (while we were in the apartment) but the rest of us were basket cases, lots of tears shed. Her foster family loved her so deeply and have grieved the loss of her in their life. I/we are forever grateful to them for the love they gave her, for welcoming her into their family for 2.5yrs. When we got into the taxi was when it seemed to hit her. She started crying for them, let me hold/comfort her and then fell asleep, almost as if it was too much to bear. When we got back to the apartment (where I was staying) she played for a while with me and then SOBBED and WAILED, her poor little heart breaking... the start of her grieving. She let me hold her again and comfort her; she and I both crying until she fell asleep (while continuing to hiccup in her sleep b/c her cry had been so deep and so long :-( ). I can't even imagine what all she felt, her entire world being ripped out from her and being turned upside down. Of course she was 'prepared', as 'prepared' as a 2.5yr old can be, which really isnt that much. How do you comprehend at 2.5 that your 'family' who you lived with as long as you can remember isnt really your family and now you are with some strange lady who speaks only a tiny bit of the language you speak and wont take you back 'home'. SO much I could say here:  FINALLY being with my daughter (what I had dreamt and longed and hoped for for SO long), but not having my other half (aka incredible husband) and other daughters with me, heart breaking for EB's grief, thinking about her birth mother and all she went through, being jetlagged, and then not getting to sleep for more than 1-2hrs straight while in HK (b/c EB wasnt sleeping but was crying out/waking up multiple times at night)... and then 1.5 days later we flew home :-)

Fri August 14th, 2009: On the trip home, EB fell asleep on the plane an hour before we took off in HKG. She slept for about 2hrs and then was awake for the remainder of the 12hr flight!!! literally awake and playing and eating and moving and playing and eating and moving (and NOT AT ALL interested in the heavy DVD player that I had brought for her to watch TV on), until we landed in SFO, when she promptly fell asleep again :-) Man was I ever grateful for the stroller I had bought in HK! EB slept the entire time through immigration (which took a LONG TIME even though we were 2nd in line), and baggage claim (which also took a while, my fault entirely!), and the next security check and the mad rush through SFO to our flight for ORD which left in 5mins. So back to baggage claim, I was so sleep deprived that I could not for the LIFE of me remember what her suitcase looked like (it had been purchased by the staff in HK so was not one I had brought with me)... all I knew was that it had wheels on it and was a dark color - pretty much like every other bag going around on the carousel! After waiting and waiting and waiting (and getting nervous b/c our next flight was due to depart soon) I finally found it and pushed the stroller and our bags through customs, and security, and ran to our next flight (with literally only enough time for a FAST diaper change in the stroller). The second and third flights were fine (read: she slept a lot and I dozed) and we landed at our final destination on August 14th around 8pm. HOME.... almost!

OK, so thats all for now except for the pics...

Day 1: First Meeting with Ella (playing with some toys that Mommy brought)

Who is this lady?

Getting to hold my daughter!!!! Could my smile BE any bigger? :-D

With EBs foster mother, out at lunch

Out for a walk (er, sleep) on Bowen Rd

Day 3: Farewell with foster family.

 

 

Day 4: Playing with Moms REALLY old skool mobile (for use while in HK). Look at those eyes, confused/scared/so unsure, poor thing.

Day 5 (or 5.5): Sleeping on the second of three flights on the way 'home'.

First meeting of sisters at the airport.

PS Sorry about the poor quality of some of the pics... some were taken on mobiles (when lack of sleep and lack of organisation could find the proper camera NOWHERE near by...)

PPS SO grateful to my brother and sister-in-law, Ungoo & Auntie A, and sister-in-law, Auntie D, for all their support while I was in HK... bringing me yummy food while I was meeting Ella, praying with me, listening to me... just being there. Thanks guys!!!!! Love you!!!!

Our HK Timeline to EB

Sept 30th, 2008: EB formally placed 'on hold' for us

Dec 1st, 2008: Home Study Approved

Dec 3rd, 2008: Mailed I800A to USCIS

Dec 12th, 2008: Dossier sent to HK Adoption Unit

Feb 20th, 2009: USCIS Fingerpinting

Feb 28th, 2009: I800A approval by USCIS

April 8th, 2009: Matching Approval from HKSWD

May 8th, 2009: I800 provisional Approval

June 2nd, 2009: Article 5 letter issued

July 30th, 2009: HCO issued

August 7th, 2009: Amy to HK

August 10th, 2009: Amy met EB!!!

August 12th, 2009:EB's GOTCHA Day

August 14th, 2009: EB arrived home in the US

March 1st, 2010: Finalization!!!

Happy 4th CC!

Ok, so now I can't believe that baby number 2 is 4! The time has gone so fast... We had planned to have a joint birthday party for the 2 older girls (b/c of how close together their birthdays are) and they had chosen The Backyardigans as their theme. The Backyardigans is their fav TV show right now - has five characters (they have paired up each family member with a character) who use thier imaginations and go on adventures in their 'backyard'. So mommy worked hard to try and make cupcakes that looked like Uniqua and Tasha. Unfortunately it snowed a whopping 5 inches here, which shut everything down, so we were forced to cancel their party :( and then EB got sick and had to be hospitalized (which is an entirely seperate post - probably never coming) Instead are some pics of the 'home party' that we had with just our fam and our trip to Chuck E Cheese on CC's actual birthday.

Hope you enjoy!

PS We are set to go to court on March 1st to finalize EB's adoption!!!!! :D

Just a few days old

Looking so grown up!

Precious girl

Birthday bed-head :-)

Grannie A & GrandDa I came out :-)

In the backyard- spring is finally coming :-)

5 months home...

It's been a while since I've written - life is so full these days with our 3 girls and changes going on at home with hubbys work situation too.

We have just gotten home from a wonderful trip to Colorado, visiting with some of my family. EB got to meet her Pop-pop, Uncle J, Auntie S & Cousin J all for the first time. It was a much needed break, such a refreshing time in the mountains full of skiing (& ski-school for the older 2 girls), sledding, good food, wonderful company, trampolining, playing with cousin, walks, hot-tub, EB's fascination with eating snow, Dads yummy coffee, old friends, Grammys cookies, early morning cuddles in bed w/ Grammy & Pop-pop, pick-up-sticks etc etc etc. The older girls had an especially good time and were NOT happy about having to come home. Anna has already informed me that we are going back in 2 months :)

EB is continuing to do well. The trip was good for her. It brought up some issues which we are working through - helping her to know that we are her forever family, that she is not going anywhere else, is not going back to her foster family, we are not leaving her etc. I think it is so hard for her little 2 yr old mind to grasp all that has happened so we are working on reassuring her and trying to give her security that it will not happen again.

AG has just turned 5 today which I absolutely can't believe! She is such a precious girl, has an incredible heart of compassion. A few nights ago she was talking with hubby about Haiti. Shortly after their conversation she broke out in such a deep sad cry, really weeping for the people there who are hurting. She told me that she wanted to work extra hard to earn her money so she could send it to the people in Haiti. This precious characteristic about her is something that I am so in awe of, how God has given her this at such a young age. I find myself wondering how he will continue to use it in her life.

CC... She actually talked to her teacher at school today! This is huge for her which makes me laugh b/c those of you that know her know how she talks non-stop at home (bosses AG around half the time!) but for the last 5 months she has said maybe a total of 10 words to her teacher (and friends at school). She is really looking forward to the girls joint birthday party which we are having at the end of the month.

The hubster and I... are in the process of change :) Hubby is going out on his own work wise - so 'BC Media' will soon be run out of our home (starting Feb 1). We are really excited about this opportunity but at the same time I (momma) am thinking about the bills that need to be paid etc. I think it will be good for us (me) though, bring us back to total dependancy on God to provide for all our needs. Also, this month my maternal Grandma passed away - so have been thinking on that and mourning her leaving.

Well, I hear the pitter-patter of little feet, which means that nap time is over so I better go... will try to upload pictures to this post soon but until then...

PS Our attorney called yesterday and we have a tentative court date of March 1st for the finalization of our adoption of EB!!!! :D

Sweet sisters

Princesses & the Queen :)

Snow Whites

Incredible Mountains!

AG & CC on the magic carpet at ski-school

Out for a walk

3 months home

It is late - too late to be trying to update our blog but it seems like there is very little time these days. My (momma's) days are so full keeping up with the three girls that there seems to be very little time for anything else - but I wouldn't choose it any other way :)

How are we doing??? Good, I think, all things considered. We have our good days and our rough days but each day things seem to get a little easier and the challenges less. I don't really know where to start - so much has happened, so much that I would love to share. Adoption is an incredible thing, a wild ride at times. In some ways it feels like it has been so much longer than 3 months since I brought EB home and at other times I feel like I am still getting to know my daughter. I have been going through EB's pictures from her first 2.5yrs and have found myself wishing that I had asked more questions when I was in HK, things that I think EB will ask at some point: like when she first started walking, and talking, and how old she was when she got her first tooth. I am forever grateful to her foster family for all they did for her - they changed her life!

EB is sleeping wonderfully now - typically 11hrs at night and 1-2hrs during her afternoon nap. She is still a great eater going after pretty much anything, although she LOVES her steamed rice :) She is talking so much now (not very clearly but A LOT) - mainly in english but still a few cantonese words here and there (po, chor, wan, sik sai). She has learned/is learning to use the potty :) :) very happy about that :) Elmo's Potty Time Video is one of her favorites... Books, blocks, lego's, coloring, singing (her favorite song is My Jesus, My Savior/Shout to the Lord), playdoh, Mr Potato head are just a few of her favorite things. She still sticks really close to mommy at home, and LOVES the long cuddle time before nap & night time. We've taken her to the zoo twice now and although she loves the elephants and giraffes, the monkeys swinging in the trees are by far her favorite animal! We are still working on boundaries and obeying Mom & Dad - no does mean no :) but we're getting there. The main challenge with EB is that she will still initiate conversation with anyone (cashier at any store, customer anywhere) and then try to hug/touch them. She has stopped telling them that she loves them (in Cantonese) which is good! but we are still working hard on her learning that we are her family and we are different from other people... our relationship is different... you don't reach for comfort from strangers... So would appreciate your prayers for that- for her continued attachment and bonding to us and strength for me b/c it is an issue every time we go out! and for wisdom to know how to best deal with it.

CC: She is doing so well! It was definitely hardest on her when EB came home. Her curly blond hair (which I'm sure EB had never seen before) was an instant magnet for EB (she just kept touching it over & over) which drove CC nuts! Right now CC loves her little sister who follows her around and copies everything she does (and I mean EVERYTHING!). She has also seemed to settle into her role of being a big sister too- wanting to help EB buckle her seat belt on her chair etc. CC has loved going to school (3 mornings a week) and is just doing really well overall.

AG: Is also doing great. She and CC are both at school 3 mornings a week - Daddy takes them on his way to work and they love that time with him in the car. AG is so excited for her upcoming birthday - I can't believe my first baby is going to be 5 already!!!!

Hubby & I: Are good... tired but good :) We have so much to be grateful for! We have gone out on a couple of dates recently, leaving the girls with our fantastic sitter after I've put EB to bed (so she has no idea we've left her!), which has been so good for us! EB started speech therapy a few weeks ago and this week I will actually be leaving her with the therapist for her sessions and I will have 45 minutes on my own! 2x a week! There is a barnes and noble about 2 blocks away so I can't wait to go and browse and have a little time to myself!

And now... a few pics ;-)

With their pumpkins and designs that they chose :)

Blueberry Tongues :P

At the zoo

Our journey

Dear friends & family,
This is loooong overdue but we wanted to let you all know that we are in the process of adopting from Hong Kong. We have already completed our home study & dossier and are waiting for final matching approval from the Hong Kong Adoption Unit. We can’t wait to bring our daughter home!

Backing up a little bit:
Before hubby & I were married we talked about our desires to expand our family through adoption and now here we are. On September 4th 2008 we attended an informational meeting about adoption and started the paperwork process. Up until this point we were unsure about whether we wanted to pursue a domestic or international adoption but after the meeting felt like God was directing us to Asia. On September 17th we went to our agency’s local office, to meet with the director of Int’l Adoptions. While we were there she showed us a long list of children who were currently available for adoption, some of them are kids that hubby & I had taken care of when we lived in Hong Kong. We printed out the profiles of a few of these precious children and took them home to pray about them. At home, there was one little girl whom we both fell in love with and felt was to be part of our family. We prayed a lot, requested more information about this little girl, met with doctors from our local Children’s Hospital International Adoption Clinic and on September 30th told the adoption agency that we wanted to pursue adopting EB. They put her ‘on hold’ for us, meaning she was no longer available for other couples to pursue, while we began all the paperwork...  and I do mean ALL the paperwork  :-)

What’s next:
All of our paperwork (dossier) is in Hong Kong being reviewed by the Adoption Unit of the Social Welfare Department. They had some additional questions for us which we just answered this week… So we are ‘patiently’ waiting to get the official matching approval (which means that we are approved/matched by HK AU to adopt EB). After that happens it usually takes about 3 months before we would go to Hong Kong to pick up EB. At this point we are planning on both hubby & I going, so will leave AG & CC here while we travel. We are concurrently going through the application process with the US Citizenship & Immigrations Services. We have an appointment with them on Feb 20t.

Your part in our journey:
1) We would really appreciate your prayers:
• For favor with AU as they review our paperwork.
• For approval of our USCIS application.
• For everything to be done in a timely manner.
• For God to be preparing all of us for the transitions ahead.

2) We would love to hear from you:
• Advice from those who have done this before – things we should or should not do :-)
• Encouragement/prayers etc

Thanks so much! We will do our best to keep you updated as things progress.

Much love from all,